The thought flashed through my mind as I watched her walk towards me. My internal monologue was racing as she walked in my direction. She looked directly into my eyes, smiled, waved, and walked directly over to my table. I thought he was joking.
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And if it did, how the hell have I or the authorities never heard of it? Could there really be an elite sexual underworld going on in every city across the country where the highest bidder could sleep with and date the most attractive women? Typically in the form of a monthly cash allowance, travel, shopping or rent assistance. Typically, they offers companionship and often sexual intimacy. The context and paradigm of these relationships are as variable as the people who engage in them. There were individuals looking for discreet sexual relationships, platonic companionship, partners willing to accommodate their hectic business and travel schedule, and everything in between.
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Seeing this diversity among the sugar dating community, the fact still remained. No matter how well you spin it the overwhelming majority of people on the platform were there for one reason. And, despite the surprising abundance of sugar dating sites available, the overwhelming majority of individuals flocked to a single platform. As soon as I logged on, thousands of sugar babies popped up—and those were only the women who met my specific search criteria in my zip code.
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New women were ing every hour as I would hit refresh and a new sugar baby was born and I found myself wondering…just how many men and women are engaged in this and more importantly, why? And looking at data from Seeking Arrangement itself, we discover that, of the 10, yes ten million active users inside of the United States, there are three sugar babies for every one sugar daddy.
Meaning that there are more than 6. After all, 6. According to the U. Censusthere are roughly million people in the United States between the ages of 18 and So now, we have an estimated 60, women between the ages of 18 and And of those women, more than 6, are on Seeking Arrangement. My mind started spinning as I checked my message inbox. And staring back at me from my dimly lit monitor, were five, almost immediate positive responses. Yet here I was, with five different women trying to meet up with me. And then, something happened that perfectly illustrates just how profoundly sugar dating changes the dating dynamics for men.
So, as a test I sent her a message on Seeking Arrangement without sharing my photos to see her response.
Needless to say, on Seeking Arrangement, women treat men differently. Responses are prompt and kind even if she has no idea what you look like or who you are. Within a few days, I had dozens of phone s, scheduled multiple dates, and had countless women asking me when I would be available to meet. Calling the shots and having their pick of sugar babies without any sense of scarcity or fear of rejection.
I was showered in compliments and praise so frequently and so fervently, that I began to feel like I was frequenting an online strip club—as if it was the job of these women to make men feel respected and desired. There must be a catch? It was a small taste of what I imagine most beautiful women have felt on a daily basis since hitting puberty.
As I browsed through hundreds of seemingly attractive women, I began to doubt the veracity of the profiles I was seeing. A high-quality, sophisticated woman would never use a site like this…. Many of them were college educated, some of them graduates from prestigious universities and, in several cases, Phds.
I was curious, but still hesitant. To my naive and innocent mind, there was simply no chance in hell that the women with whom I was connecting were really them.
For days I engaged in an internal debate about whether or not I should pursue this channel any further. But there was a deeper more potent emotion fueling my hesitancy. Of course, the women I desire sometimes go out to bars on the weekends, have a few drinks with girlfriends, and maybe the occasional t to take the edge off of a long day, but that is the extent of their debauchery.
They had reputations to protect, standards to maintain, and an already abundant pool of men begging to date them. I wanted to know the realities facing men today and the potential problem posed by the now transactional nature of dating, romance and intimacy.
Looking around the bar, I noticed a brawny middle aged just out of prison looking man eyeing us a few times as he nursed the same bourbon neat, for nearly half an hour.
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What the hell have I gotten myself into? As the minutes passed by and the aforementioned man quietly seeking the bar, my queasiness was replaced by a friendly sense of bewilderment. The girl sitting across from me was, despite her outward beauty, rather normal, in fact, quite interesting. The night concluded with no fanfare, no exchanging of cash for sex, and no mention of my purported net worth or financial capability. As I laid in bed that night, thinking back on the experience, my confusion only compounded. And surely, that date was an anomaly? I resolved to roll the dice a few times more, just to figure out what the hell was going on here.
To my surprise and curiosity I found that merely half of the women with whom I went out had no des on my financial assets. And, as long as I took them Sugardaddy and paid for a fun night out, the conversation never came up. And these lasses and I went our separate ways within an hour and I never heard from them again, yet the interactions only served to exacerbate my existing confusion. Yet here they adventure.
Sitting across from me and casually naming a price they were willing to accept for sex. Openly discussing the monetary value they placed on the most intimate part of their lives no different than if we were discussing her favorite Netflix show. I thought to myself. Those experiences aside, I was type surprised by the relative normalcy of the overall experience with many of the women I met. And watching my video training on becoming a stronger grounded man, doubling your confidence, reclaiming your personal power and working with a oriented mentor will greatly help too.
You can watch it here. Even though I paid for for dates just like any normal dateI noticed that the women who never asked me for money seemed attracted to the allure of status, power and the lifestyle that financial success can bring. Many of these women have been with broke boyfriend after broke boyfriend who never had the means to take her out and enjoy the simple luxuries that money can offer.
I was playing the game with an upper advantage.
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I had the skills necessary to date attractive women without using a site like Seeking Arrangement and the platform served as little more than a conduit through which the two of us connected. But even as I found myself on a second or third date with some of the women I met on the site, there was an inescapable elephant in the room gnawing my mind. How could I knowingly and willingly date a woman who was, by all reasonable expectations, likely engaged in other relationships that were tantamount to escorting?
How does the systematization of and unfettered access to sugar dating affect men, women, and the traditional dating paradigm? As I continued my descent deeper into the underbelly of this bizarre and baffling underworld I began to wonder… Will being a sugar baby one day become as normal as having an online dating profile? How will the proliferation of sugar dating and Seeking Arrangement affect your average man in the 21st century?
Especially men who have become stagnant and lost their masculine edge. Men who are not working on themselves, living adventurous lives, staying in shape, increasing their income and developing their social skills. I have strong reason to believe that for the men who are not growing personally and professionally it will be even harder, if not damn near impossible, for them to enter into relationships with attractive women from this day forward.
After all, why would a woman date men who are barely getting by with little ambition when they can auction their time and sex off to men who can provide far more enticing experiences and get paid for it?
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And for the men who do have the resources and financial cash flow necessary to sustain such a lifestyle? How will the one-dimensionality of their relationships affect their growth as a man? And the more I thought about it, the more I realized just how slippery the slope of sugar dating really is. But what really troubles me, is there has never been a time in history where so many women from lower, middle and even upper classes in society have so freely and casually chosen to adopt a lifestyle that is tantamount to prostitution.
To the outside observer, sugar dating, especially for women, seems like something of a fantasy.
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They have a large pool of traditional male attention, emotional affection and boyfriends to choose from. The plight of the middle class—budgeting, saving, learning, investing, working hard to get ahead, spending most of your money on bills, rejecting mindless consumerism, embracing minimalism, overcoming struggle—these were all trivial matters that the sugar baby could avoid by auctioning herself to a sugar daddy. With the simple act of spreading her legs, the adversity to which her mother and grandmother were subjected was now easily escapable. Were they thinking of how this choice could affect their current or future partner or children?
Would they be able to stop once their needs were met? Would women engaged in this lifestyle wait even longer to get married and have children in order to fully capitalize on their youth and beauty? The more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder late at night….
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Where does this dark and deep rabbit hole really go? Every time I refreshed my browser on Seeking Arrangement I saw new sugar babies who had decided to auction themselves off to sugar daddies to partake in a more glamorous and appealing lifestyle than making money by working hard and finding a good man to raise a family with. The millennial environment we find ourselves incentivizes women to go all-in on the quick cash of new age prostitution fueled by materialism, consumerism and exotic lifestyles driven by an ego galvanizing social media generation. Why gamble and wait until old age to enjoy a better life and luxury lifestyle when she can sell her time and body to a sugar daddy and enjoy it now?